Jan
30
I used to beat myself up for everything, even when I’d do a good job. Because, you know, I could always do better.
I also used to say “I’m sorry†when a) I wasn’t sorry and b) at the weirdest times, like when someone would bump into me or when I’d want to express a difference of opinion. (Blogger and author Therese Borchard can relate. She gave exposure therapy a try for eliminating her apologizing addiction.)
And any time I’d make a mistake, big or small, I’d feel like I just committed a mortal sin. All mistakes were magnified and the guilt and shame made me want to crawl under a rock. Making mistakes became a gnawing cycle that also chipped away at my already unstable self-esteem.
Saying no to someone was painful, and there were many times that I just wanted to be alone.
“Pioneering self-esteem researcher Morris Rosenberg asserted that nothing is more stressful than lacking the secure anchor of self-esteem,†according to Glenn R. Schiraldi, Ph.D., author of The Self-Esteem Workbook and a professor at the University of Maryland School of Public Health.
In my case, this was certainly true. My low self-esteem led to several toxic relationships, extra stress and a sinking mood. And along the way, I just didn’t enjoy myself as much as I could have.
Rosenberg’s research, Schiraldi said, revealed the following signs of low self-esteem:
- *Sensitivity to criticism
- *Social withdrawal
- *Hostility
- *Excessive preoccupation with personal problems
- *Physical symptoms such as fatigue, insomnia and headaches
“People even put on a false front to impress [others],†he said.
People with a shaky self-esteem also struggle with self-critical, negative thoughts, said Lisa Firestone, Ph.D, a clinical psychologist and co-author of Conquer Your Critical Inner Voice. “These thoughts often criticize and hold them back from going after what they want in life.â€
Read in Full:
http://psychcentral.com/blog/archives/2012/01/30/signs-of-low-self-esteem/
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