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22

 

Simone Hoermann, Ph.D.

A&E is airing a 60 minute reality TV show on people who have trouble with hoarding– the inability to discard personal possessions even if they appear to be only of limited value.  Each episode follows two people with challenges and tells their stories.

The show illustrates the many problems that come along with hoarding: From difficulty walking around the home, to health risks, conflict with family members, threat of eviction, or fire hazards.  Many hoarders are too ashamed to invite people to enter their home, ending up socially isolated and feeling overwhelmed, demoralized, and hopeless.

Protagonists are matched up with therapists and professional organizers to help them adress the issue, get organized, and get rid of the clutter.  This poses tremendous emotional strain on the hoarder, who tends to react with intense feelings of loss, grief, anger, or anxiety.  The show acknowledges that the home visit is usually just the beginning, though.  In real life, clutter is often not the only thing a person is struggling with.  Change is difficult, and maintaining the newfound order and clutter-free state is a challenge.

It so happens that the journal Clinical Psychology Review currently has an article in press in which several international experts on hoarding, including Alberto Pertusa, Randy Frost, and Gail Steketee, review the current state of the art on this issue. Let me summarize here for you a few of the major conclusions of their paper that may even surprise some regular viewers of the A&E show:

 

                        – It’s common: Significant compulsive hoarding appears to occur in around 5% of the population.

 

                       – On its own: Hoarding has long been considered a part of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder and is also considered a symptom of Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder.  Some people who have OCD and hoarding behaviors (in fact, about one-fourth of them) report having obsessions and compulsions around their hoarding (for instance, checking behaviors; fear that people can become contaminated if items are discarded; or mental rituals when discarding an item). However, after a thorough review of the literature,  Pertusa and colleagues suggest that compulsive hoarding, while it commonly co-occurs with OCD and Personality Disorders, may be best classified as a concrete disorder with its own diagnostic criteria. 

 

                        –Hoarders are spenders: There seems to be a relation between hoarding and impulse control problems: Hoarders like to acquire and collect things excessively, and have a hard time discarding items.  Nearly 75% percent of hoarders engage in excessive buying and about 50% excessively acquire free things.

 

                      –Cluttered, not filthy: While the A&E show may present many people whose homes look unhygienic and flithy, research on the topic of squalor (domestic neglect and lack of personal hygiene) and hoarding is still scarce. Despite this scarcity, Pertusa and colleagues conclude that the great majority of hoarders do not exhibit self-neglect and squalor.

 

                        –In the family: The review references a study by Frost and Gross (1993), which found that 78% of people with compulsive hoarding reported having a first-degree family member who was also a hoarder.

 

                   –There’s hope: Frost and Steketee have developed a treatment manual that is based on Cognitive Behavior Therapy and includes office and in-home sessions, skills training such as organizing, problem solving, and decision making, and exposure to sorting, discarding, and not acquiring. The course of treatment takes about 26 sessions over 7-12 months, and it was tested on 14 hoarders.  Ten of them completed treatment and showed significant decrease of their hoarding behavior.

Source:  http://www.mentalhelp.net/poc/view_doc.php?type=doc&id=36515&cn=8



 

By Rick Nauert PhD Senior News Editor
Reviewed by John M. Grohol, Psy.D. on April 13, 2010

A new study suggests the diagnostic criteria used to determine eating disorders may be too stringent.

Researchers from the Stanford University School of Medicine and Lucile Packard Children’s Hospital believe diagnostic cutoffs delay treatment for individuals with anorexia nervosa and bulimia nervosa.

According to the researchers, many patients who do not meet full criteria for these diseases are nevertheless quite ill, and the diagnosis they now receive, “Eating Disorder Not Otherwise Specified,” may delay their ability to get treatment.

“There’s mounting evidence that we should reconsider the EDNOS categorization for young people,” said Rebecka Peebles, MD, the study’s primary author.

The EDNOS diagnosis has become a “mosh pit,” lumping dissimilar patients into a single category that gets poor recognition from clinicians and health insurers, she said.

“It is a bit misleading to patients — it can make them feel like they don’t have a real eating disorder,” said Peebles, an instructor in pediatrics at Stanford and an adolescent medicine specialist with the Comprehensive Eating Disorders Program at Packard Children’s Hospital.

Anorexia affects about one percent of teen girls, while bulimia affects between two and five percent of teen girls. Both diseases are more common among females than males.

Their diagnostic criteria were developed by expert consensus, without the benefit of studies to track patients’ health.

An anorexia diagnosis is now based on being at less than 85 percent of the expected body weight, loss of menstrual periods for at least three months and fear of weight gain despite being dangerously thin.

Bulimia patients repeatedly binge on large quantities of food, then “purge” calories by vomiting, abusing laxatives or diuretics, or overexercising. Both diseases can cause serious long-term health problems, and severe cases may lead to death.

Peebles’ team conducted the first-ever large study to ask whether adolescents with EDNOS are less ill than those who meet the full diagnostic criteria for anorexia or bulimia.

The research, published online in Pediatrics, examined records from all 1,310 female patients treated for eating disorders at Packard Children’s between January 1997 and April 2008.

They verified patients’ diagnoses of anorexia, bulimia or EDNOS, and created categories of “partial anorexia nervosa” and “partial bulimia nervosa” to analyze patients who barely missed cutoffs for these diseases.

“Our purpose was to ask if the diagnostic criteria now in use are really separating out the sickest of the sick,” Peebles said.

Patients’ conditions were assessed by noting signs of malnutrition — such as low heart rate, low blood pressure, low body temperature, low blood levels of potassium and phosphorus — and long QT interval (an electrocardiogram measurement linked to risk of sudden cardiac death).

Nearly two-thirds of the patients studied had EDNOS. As the researchers suspected, the EDNOS category acted as a catchall; patients with partial anorexia were more similar to those with full-blown anorexia than to other EDNOS patients with partial bulimia, for instance.

In addition, 60 percent of EDNOS patients met medical criteria for hospitalization and this group was, on average, sicker than patients diagnosed with full-blown bulimia.

The sickest EDNOS patients were those who had dropped more than 25 percent of their body weight before diagnosis. These patients had been overweight and had lost weight too quickly and dangerously in order to end up at what is typically considered a normal weight.

“People were initially just patting them on the back for their weight loss,” Peebles said. “It often took months or years for others to realize that what they were doing didn’t seem healthy.” Despite their normal body weights, this group was in some ways worse off than underweight patients diagnosed with anorexia, she added. “They manifested criteria of severe malnutrition.”

In sum, Peebles said, the study suggests that medical criteria for eating disorders should be re-evaluated. Though the current diagnostics cover the right general areas, “we erroneously treat these criteria in a very black-and-white way,” she said.

“Many practitioners interpret these to believe that menses has to be lost to get an anorexia diagnosis; bulimics have to binge and purge at least two times a week for three months. These findings illustrate the arbitrary nature of those cutoffs.”

The issue is particularly urgent because many health insurers offer less coverage for EDNOS treatment than for treatment of anorexia or bulimia. And doctors and parents may be falsely reassured if a child is labeled with EDNOS.

“I think that when parents walk out of a doctor’s office having heard their kid doesn’t meet criteria for anorexia, they’re relieved,” Peebles said. But they shouldn’t let their guard down: in many cases, the child’s disturbed eating patterns still need treatment.

Source: Stanford University Medical Center

http://psychcentral.com/news/2010/04/13/medical-criteria-for-eating-disorders-miss-the-mark/12795.html



 

The system set up to help children with special educational needs can be as frustrating to parents as mainstream classes seem to their kids. With education a key pillar of the coming election, Bill Tuckey – who has himself battled the authorities on behalf of his son – corners Ed Balls and Michael Gove to ask: why is it so difficult to give our children the education they deserve?

It was only after her 12-year-old son had called her a bitch and thrown his rucksack so hard against the car windscreen that she thought it would break, that Catherine Hastings decided something radical needed to be done about his schooling. It was the second time she’d tried to drop off Max that day – on the first occasion he’d sneaked back home as soon as she’d left him at the school gates. “He was so distressed at having to go,” she says. “And when I finally got him out of the car, I could see he was just hanging around waiting till I drove off. I wound down the window and said, ‘What are you doing?’ He looked at me and his shoulders drooped. He said, ‘I’m not going in.’ I told him. ‘You better get in the car then.’ He sobbed on the way back, and actually said to me, ‘I can’t cope’ – it was awful, can you imagine your 12-year-old son in that state? It was at that point that I said to him, ‘I’ve found this special school, it’s got motorbikes,’ which he liked at the time.”

Before that meltdown in his mum’s car, Max’s journey through six different schools in seven years of mainstream education could be described only as Dickensian, peppered as it was with tales of bullying, neglect, exclusion and misunderstanding of his needs. For Max is on the autistic spectrum – “very, very clever,” as his mum points out, “on the genius scale clever” – but nonetheless in need of much support.

His story resumes later – just one out of many such horror stories that, as a parent of a child with special educational needs (SEN), one hears about in my particular liberal north London village.

There’s Margaret and Alastair, who are fighting their second, eye-wateringly expensive legal duel in two years to stop the local education authority removing their dyslexic and visually impaired 11-year-old son from his specialist school, in order to place him somewhere cheaper; the school which finally cured him of the suicidal thoughts that five long, alienated years at his local primary had allowed to creep in.

There’s Eleanor, whose son has been excluded several times from the shiny new flagship academy he studies at, one of several autistic pupils whose behavioural tics have fallen foul of its much-trumpeted zero-tolerance behavioural policies.

Paul and Helen, meanwhile, have been left bewildered and angry by their newly adopted son’s string of primary-school exclusions. He’s only six years old, and with all the upheavals in his young life, it’s hardly surprising that he’s occasionally bewildered and angry himself.

I could go on – list them by the dozen, all within a mile or two of where I live, all struggling with unsympathetic teachers or incompetent professionals, penny-pinching local authorities or draining legal wrangles – a toxic morass in the middle of which their child sits, miserable, let down, or excluded.

We meet up to share stories from the front line, unpicking the reality of Britain’s long-standing policy of mainstream inclusion. This is the SEN underground – we’re everywhere, if you know where to look.

One in five British schoolchildren are diagnosed as having special educational needs – which could mean anything from a minor hearing impairment to a profound developmental delay. The Lamb Inquiry, published in December, was a comprehensive, Government-funded survey looking into how to improve parental confidence in their schooling. Its chairman, Brian Lamb, reported that he had met some of the “angriest” parents in the country among the 1,000 he spoke to during his nationwide research.

He advised Schools Secretary Ed Balls that, “Parents need to be listened to more and the system needs to be more ambitious for their children… We need a radical overhaul.”

Lamb set out 51 recommendations, all of which Balls’ department agreed with and is now busy turning into a flurry of initiatives to try to plug the holes in the inclusion ship, which almost everyone agrees is a very leaky ship indeed.

There will be more training for teachers and closer scrutiny of schools’ and local education authorities’ (LEAs) performances, including the number of exclusions – shockingly, SEN children are, at present, eight times more likely to be excluded than their peers. Parents will have more input in schools, and more support, including a new national SEN helpline.

But come 6 May, should a Tory government be elected, all that caulking and replanking could prove a waste of time. David Cameron, who, like the present prime minister has his own parental experiences of special needs, is planning to scupper the whole craft. To end what his draft manifesto calls “the ideologically driven closure of special schools” and “the bias towards the inclusion of children with special needs in mainstream schools”.

With an election looming in which education is such a hotly contested issue, writing this article presented me with an irresistible opportunity: to collar voter-hungry politicians such as Ed Balls and Shadow Schools Secretary Michael Gove, and thrash out with them the issues which I and my fellow SEN parents get so worked up about around our kitchen tables.

First, let me tell you about my experiences with my own son, Alex. He is 10 years old and has been at a mainstream primary school since the age of six. It wasn’t an easy choice to send him there. The experts were divided as to whether it was a suitable setting for a child on the autistic spectrum, a child who can be overwhelmed by too much noise or visual stimulation.

We went to see some special schools before opting for it. In one, there were several children in crash helmets who’d learnt from each other the habit of repeatedly banging their heads against the wall. In another, the headteacher casually referred to the “strap chair” used to restrain the more unruly pupils. A third offered a clapped-out building and staff who looked as if they’d been there since dinosaurs roamed – a common picture, given that there are nearly twice as many teachers over 50 in special schools as in mainstream ones.

None of these places matched our ambitions for Alex, who, despite his delayed speech and language and a tendency to withdraw into his own world, is also a clever, friendly child; a computer expert who has been reading PC Professional magazine since the age of four.

So, partly because there were no other attractive options, we made our decision to go local. We would make it work. Bus in all the expertise that he needed, build a team around him. It would be a struggle, but at least he would be there with his siblings, be a part of the community – and that was surely the way it should be.

We had to fight hard to get that team in place. When we first asked the local authority for a statement of special educational needs (the document that sets out the provision your child is entitled to), the locum who assessed Alex thought he’d be unlikely to get any help – she’d seen a child only the day before, she told us, whose arms and legs were “just three inches long”, and she hadn’t agreed to give him a thing.

In his inquiry, Brian Lamb speaks of meeting LEA-employed educational psychologists who “described a settled professional culture where it is expected that they… will not recommend provision that they know the local authority cannot immediately provide”.

It was only by threatening to go to SEN Tribunal (the judicial body where parents can complain against LEA decisions), that we eventually managed to squeeze out of them a full-time learning support assistant (LSA), and weekly visits from a speech and language therapist and specialist teacher. We’d argued for more, but all in all, it was a pretty good package.

We were lucky not to have to carry out our threat. There is a flourishing offshoot of the legal profession whose sole raison d’être is to support parents at such tribunals, where LEAs will often come armed with barristers and an intimidating array of expert witnesses, and where parents will need to lay out well in excess of £10,000 to amass a convincing counter-argument. One mother described the experience to me as being “like a job preparing for it, and so stressful. There were six people from the LEA up against us. Walking in there, I couldn’t stop crying.”

On his first day at school, Alex hid under the climbing-frame in the playground and refused to come out for half the morning. He’s fearful of any kind of change. But he had a brilliant LSA, an enthusiastic class teacher and a supportive head, and with each passing day, he settled further into the life of the school. Staff were sent off on extra training days and, as parents, we were allowed to participate in his planning meetings. Within a year, he was being hailed by all as the very model of successful inclusion, benefiting from just the kind of provision that the Lamb Inquiry wants to make commonplace.

But it has not been all sunshine; as the years have gone by, the shortcomings of this model have become more obvious. Every September, Alex has a new class teacher who is at square one in terms of understanding Alex’s needs – some make the effort to get to square two more enthusiastically than others. And in a class of 30, regardless of the class teacher’s expertise, there is very little time to bring it to bear on any one child. As a result, Alex’s LSAs bear a heavy weight of responsibility – again, some more enthusiastically and competently than others.

Then there are Alex’s classmates. As they have grown older, they have grown more aware of his difference; his circle of schoolfriends has dwindled to virtually nil.

I don’t think my wife or I are naturally pushy parents, but we have learnt to be. We have to constantly encourage, cajole and organise, to make Alex’s support package work. To ensure all the professionals keep their eye on the ball. When you’ve hung out in as many NHS and LEA waiting-rooms as we’ve done, you get to see the results of a more laissez-faire approach – children with complex cognitive difficulties, some of whom haven’t even been diagnosed, let alone supported. Parents who perhaps do not have the education to get the help they need: isolated, driven to divorce – utterly failed by the system.

Even with all the help we have secured for Alex, he has had some very dark moments indeed in his school career, moments when he has declared he hates being there, hates himself, and hates his life. As with any mainstream model, the expertise to address his issues is always an add-on, a peripheral; with the best will in the world, Alex’s undeniably excellent team are often obliged to use their limited time to manage Alex’s problems, rather than solve them.

As you have probably gathered by now, for parents like me, the issue of SEN schooling can become something of an obsession. At the moment, the focus is where Alex will go to secondary. The local choices are limited. There is the giant comprehensive in which he would have to shunt distressingly from class to class throughout the day, and where there is no great expertise on site. There is an academy with a massively oversubscribed autism unit. There is a special school that attempts to meet “a rainbow” of wildly divergent of needs, where a large minority of students have complex behavioural and emotional difficulties, and GCSE results are very low. It is a pretty typical local picture, which may explain why the number of SEN pupils in private schools almost trebled over the past decade.

In a high-ceilinged room somewhere in the depths of Westminster’s Portcullis House, Shadow Schools Secretary Michael Gove is trying to convince me that it is the Conservatives who can provide parents such as myself with the kind of real choice we’re all desperate for. “We need to have a fundamental review of how we provide education for children with special educational needs,” he says, a hint of Aberdonian burr in his voice. “My view is that inclusion has been used as a doctrine by people who are not primarily interested in the welfare of the child, they are interested in saving money under a cloak of benevolence; while inclusion probably works for some, parents should be able to choose an environment where their child’s needs are understood, and where they can have an education tailored to their requirements.”

Gove says that the Tories’ first step on this road would be to wrest control of SEN assessment from local authorities. Instead, independent educational psychologists would assess each child and create a “Special Needs Profile” for them, based on a dozen or so clearly defined “Support Categories”. Each of these categories would legally attract a sum of money, which would be paid to the child’s school.

He also aims to cut miles of red tape out of the system in order to encourage more teachers and parents to set up special schools. “Ultimately, what we want to move to is a system of pupil funding where you assign to a child a particular sum and they can take that to whichever provider they want.”

The obvious question is: how are they going to pay for all this? Better assessment will presumably mean more children needing funding. And a wonderful chocolate box of assorted special schools surely won’t come cheap either. Even now, shelling out for the paltry five per cent of SEN children who are taught in special schools accounts for around 40 per cent of Britain’s total SEN budget.

“We had a conference where a variety of heads of special-needs schools spoke,” he says. “All of them believed that if we gave them the freedom to change the way they operate, and the money being spent on children in a mainstream setting, they could easily provide the same, if not more, and significantly better suited to children’s pastoral needs.

“I wouldn’t want anyone to vote Conservative on the basis that we would spend more on this area,” he warns. “But we will not be looking at SEN funding as an area where savings can be made.”

The Conservatives have been jumping up and down about the 9,000 or so special-school places lost since New Labour came to power, so it is odd to note that it was while they were in charge that the numbers slipped most dramatically, by nearly 30 per cent between 1979 and 1991. This followed 1978’s Warnock Report, a radical document commissioned by Margaret Thatcher, which highlighted the way in which SEN children were marginalised, out of sight and out of mind. It set out recommendations to improve their schooling, drag them back from the howling wilderness and include them more fully in mainstream society. The report formed the basis of the 1981 Education Act, which created the whole SEN framework still in operation today.

But if the Tories first floated the inclusion ship, New Labour sailed it into the deep blue sea. New legal guidance to schools and LEAs introduced in 2001 insisted: “The starting point is always that children who have statements will receive mainstream education.” Removing Barriers to Achievement: the Government Strategy for SEN (2004), rammed the message home: “The proportion of children educated in special schools should fall over time,” it said, and there should be a “reduced reliance on statements”, as schools were given more direct cash to support SEN pupils.

Sure enough, the number of statements issued nationally did begin to fall year on year. But at the same time, the number of tribunal appeals shot up – the majority by parents complaining about their local authority’s refusal to statement their child. And, as the Lamb Inquiry found, those pots of SEN cash in school coffers are still all too often being surreptitiously spent elsewhere – on library books, school orchestras, whatever.

Watching all of this unfold, Baroness Mary Warnock shocked educationalists in 2005 when she came out in public to denounce the legacy of her own report. The ideal of inclusiveness, she wrote, “springs from hearts in the right place” but moving pupils out of special schools had turned out to be “disastrous”.

Given all the above, it is hard not to wonder why anyone would view the original inclusion dream as anything more than woolly minded 1970s hippie nonsense. But that would be over-simplistic. Mainstream does not work for everybody, but the vast majority of schoolchildren with SEN do cope well, especially those with purely physical disabilities. And there are also plenty of parents who still have to fight for the right to send their child to a “normal” school – with academies a particular battleground, as pressure over results tempts them to discourage the less able.

God knows we wouldn’t want to go back to the segregation of the past. In the second half of the 20th century, tens of thousands of children with learning difficulties were deemed “severely educationally subnormal” and not entitled to any schooling at all. Instead, they were placed in “Junior Training Centres”, under the charge of the local health authority. It was only after the Education Act 1970 that 400 or so of these dumping grounds were rebranded as “special schools”, though the staff who worked in them didn’t require any teaching qualifications. Some are still in existence today

When you go further back into the history of special schooling, the picture gets even murkier. In the late 19th century, interpretations of Darwin’s theories spawned the eugenics movement, whose supporters believed the human race could be improved by selective breeding. In 1910, the eugenicist campaigner Mary Dendy wrote that mentally handicapped ‘ children should be “detained for the whole of their lives” to “stem the great evil of feeble-mindedness in our country”.

Her work led directly to the Mental Deficiency Act of 1913, which categorised the disabled as “idiots”, “imbeciles”, “feeble-minded” or “moral defectives” and gave rise to a programme of special-school building.

With that background, it is understandable why inclusionists’ hackles rise when the Conservatives breezily announce that the benefits of inclusion are, “in our judgement, far outweighed by the grievous damage that this policy has caused, not just to children with SEN but to their peers in mainstream education, their teachers, and their parents”.

Is there room for any compromise between the two camps? Brian Lamb thinks so. In the diplomatic style that helped him to survive a year-and-a-half of ear-bashing during the course of his inquiry – and speaking strictly with his chairman’s hat off – he says that “it would need massive investment” to create a national network of bespoke special schools. “I think what you’re looking at is having a system where you try to integrate the support more, because there is evidence that specialist support co-located in a mainstream setting works better for everyone; it’s not just about the money.”

Co-location then. Is that the answer for Alex? To join an autism unit attached to a mainstream school, into which he can retreat during break and lunchtimes, and where he can receive extra, specialist help. It is an increasingly popular model, with units for everything from hearing impairment to dyslexia. They are cheaper and more inclusive than special schools, but talking to parents whose children are in such settings, there seem to be mixed experiences: some say it gives their child the best of both worlds, others that “the rest of the school kids treat it like a zoo” – and that while the less able SEN pupils spend every spare moment huddled within the unit “excluded within an inclusive setting”, higher-ability kids cannot figure out where they belong.

Over in west London, there is a different model of inclusion on offer, one that reflects the seemingly paradoxical idea that inclusion does not necessarily mean mainstream schooling at all. Maybe it is the photos on the wall of pupils on a recent activity holiday, or the bustling preparations for a break-time cake sale, but The Moat School in Fulham exudes a quiet sense of energy and ambition that I haven’t seen in many special schools I’ve visited. This is borne out in the academic results at this private co-ed for children with specific learning difficulties, a school which describes itself as “mainstream in structure but specialist in nature”. “Over 30 per cent of our students got five or more A-star to C [grade] GCSEs, including English and maths,” says headteacher Abigail Gray. “The Lamb Inquiry says the average is about 11 per cent for kids with SEN, so we’re doing three times better than that, even though 70 per cent of our pupils have statements.”

Gray says this success is attributable to her staff. Almost all of her teachers are specialists qualified to post-graduate level, and the school’s therapists are on site, whereas in state schools they are bussed in for specific work, and contact is “brief and intermittent”.

With its tightly targeted range of pupils, this ambitious – and relatively cheap – school is presumably one that Michael Gove would like to see more of. But I am taken aback when, during an occasionally tetchy phone conversation, Ed Balls says that he, too, would like to see LEAs offering this kind of option. “The particular policy about provision and the offer to parents is a local decision,” he says. “It is not something which we centrally mandate. My view is that we do not have a commitment to inclusion or a dogma which says inclusion is better – my starting point is, I would like to give the parents and children the confidence to do what’s best for them. To choose and to combine, which requires LEAs and schools to be flexible in their provision.”

But hold on just one minute there, Ed: surely your Government has made a very clear commitment to inclusion, and backed it up with legislation which forces LEAs to do likewise? I quote to him a cross-party select committee report from 2006, which found that “it is reasonable for those in SEN to assume that the Government holds a policy of inclusion from which it has given guidance to local authorities to reduce both the proportion of pupils in special schools and to reduce reliance on statements”.

“I disagree with the select committee on that,” he says. “That has never been an instruction from the centre. Every time I visit a local authority and I talk about building schools for the future, I say to them, ‘How are you providing special-needs children with special schools?'”

It’s tempting to see Balls’ response as a classic New Labour switcheroo: pull the rug from under the opposition by stealing their best ideas. But there is evidence that New Labour did, in fact, soften its hardline inclusionist stance some time ago – it’s just that it never got round to spelling it out in any statutory guidance. As one LEA officer admitted to me, it has left her SEN department floundering. “They’re not giving us a clear direction,” she says, “so now we’ve decided just to make it up ourselves.”

I wonder what the reason is for this lack of direction. Is it that they don’t want to admit that they got it wrong? Or are they worried about calls for more cash from LEAs wanting to build special schools? The fact that Balls commissioned, and has acted upon, the Lamb Inquiry suggests he does care about special educational needs. But that was overwhelmingly about improving mainstream provision – with a few minor tweaks to the statementing/tribunal merry-go-round. As a parent, I cannot understand why he let the opportunity pass to look at the bigger picture.

The charitable view would be that you can only do so much at a time. Or, as Keith Joseph is supposed to have said when he got into the Department of Education: “I spent 30 years trying to get my hands on the levers of power and now I’ve got there, I realise they’re not connected to anything.”

Whatever the reason, the fact is that, having talked to Gove, Balls and co, I’m left with the same feeling that I often have after speaking to my local authority about Alex’s provision. The sense that nobody is really telling it like it is. That while there’s a lot of lip service paid to listening to SEN parents, there is always an unspoken financial agenda at play that takes priority.

Meanwhile, the same old wasteful and uneven system creaks on. The conclusion to Catherine Hastings and her son Max’s story is a case in point. When she took him to the special school “with motorbikes”, he took one look around and told her, “I’ve got to go here.” “It was just a complete relief,” she says. “The idea that there was somewhere that he could manage to be himself. By the end of his time at mainstream he’d become phobic about even putting pen to paper, but the school he is at now has completely changed that. He’s thriving. The massive difference is that instead of the one-size-fits-all approach, specialist schools have a very holistic approach. They ask, what are this child’s needs? Then they set targets for them and decide what provision they need to meet that. They will only take that child if they feel they will fit in with the rest of the community.

“It took a year and cost me a fortune in legal fees to get the LEA to pay for it,” she adds. “His school costs £75,000 a year. They only agreed after I told the case worker, ‘I’ve worked out where Ed Balls lives, and I’m going to walk up to his front door and tell him exactly what’s happening, and I don’t care if I get arrested.’ He looked at me as if I was a little bit crazy, but within a week we had the funding. But if they had appropriate provision within the LEA, we wouldn’t have had to go through any of this in the first place.”

Some might argue that the country can’t afford to pay for children such as Max to have such an expensive education, but Hastings has a clear answer to that. “Max is very articulate and charming,” she says. “He has massive problems too, but with the absolute ability, with the right input now, to become a completely functioning adult. He would have been living in a council flat on Disability Living Allowance for the rest of his life if he had stayed in mainstream.”

As for Alex, our school search continues. I only hope that if and when we find it, we won’t then have to start looking for the right lawyer to get a place there. There is something deeply wrong with a system in which that is such a realistic possibility.

Perhaps a more united parental voice in the whole special-needs debate might help change things. With that in mind, I am now working with others to set up a web-site, sensay.co.uk, as a national forum for SEN parents, a place where we can come together and try to figure out how to make ourselves heard. So that, instead of fighting our own individual battles for resources, we can finally get politicians, schools and local authorities to listen to us, instead of just saying they do.

Some names in this article have been changed

Source:  http://www.independent.co.uk/news/education/schools/the-boy-in-the-corner-why-do-children-with-special-needs-still-get-such-a-raw-educational-deal-1938286.html



 

Janis Sharp

PRESS ASSOCIATION

The mother of accused computer hacker Gary McKinnon is to stand against Justice Secretary Jack Straw at the General Election.

Janis Sharp blames Mr Straw, who was Foreign Secretary when Britain’s current extradition treaty was agreed with the United States, for her son’s legal predicament.

Mr McKinnon, 44, from London, is challenging a US bid to extradite him on charges of hacking into highly sensitive military computers.

“(Mr Straw) is personally at least as much to blame for the ongoing legal travesty and betrayal of British sovereignty as any of his Labour Government colleagues,” Ms Sharp said on the Free Gary McKinnon campaign website.

She added: “He was Foreign Secretary at the time of the UK Government’s secret extradition treaty negotiations with the US Government, which resulted in the Extradition Act 2003, which Gary McKinnon and other extradition cases to the USA have fallen foul of.

“The fact that the Gary McKinnon extradition case has exceeded the lifetime of this current Parliament is a scandal which belies any promises of swift or fair justice made by this Labour government.”

Ms Sharp, from Hertfordshire, said she will stand in Mr Straw’s Blackburn constituency as an independent focusing on civil liberties.

A spokesman for Mr Straw told the BBC it was right that people with differing views were able to stand in the election.

He added: “I am sure there will be lots of views heard over the next few weeks and it is good that people are able to do that.”

Source:  http://uk.news.yahoo.com/21/20100410/tuk-hacker-mother-to-battle-straw-6323e80.html

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By Rick Nauert PhD Senior News Editor
Reviewed by John M. Grohol, Psy.D. on April 13, 2010


Determining who is at risk for suicide is an arduous and inexact endeavor. Even trained clinicians can miss warning signs.


Researchers have now developed an instrument they believe will help predict those at risk.


Matthew Nock of Harvard University, along with colleagues from Harvard University and Massachusetts General Hospital, modified a well-known word-association test to measure associations between life and death/ suicide and examined if it could be effective in predicting suicide risk.


The Implicit Association Test (IAT) is a widely used test that measures automatic associations people hold about various topics. Participants are shown pairs of words; the speed of their response indicates if they unconsciously associate those words.


In the IAT version used in this study, participants classified words related to “life” (e.g., breathing) and “death” (e.g., dead) and “me” (e.g., mine) and “not me” (e.g., them).


Faster responses to “death”/”me” stimuli than “life”/”me” stimuli would suggest a stronger association between death and self.


People seeking treatment at a psychiatric emergency room participated in this study. They completed the IAT and various mental health assessments. In addition, their medical records were examined six months later to see if they had attempted suicide within that time.


The results, reported in Psychological Science, a journal of the Association for Psychological Science, revealed that participants presenting to the emergency room after a suicide attempt had a stronger implicit association between death/ suicide and self than did participants presenting with other psychiatric emergencies.


In addition, participants with strong associations between death/ suicide and self were significantly more likely to make a suicide attempt within the next six months than were those who had stronger associations between life and self.


These results suggest that an implicit association between death/ suicide and self may be a behavioral marker for suicide attempts. These findings also indicate that measures of implicit cognition may be useful for identifying and predicting clinical behaviors that tend not be reported.


As Nock explains, “these results are really exciting because they address a long-standing scientific and clinical dilemma by identifying a method of measuring how people are thinking about death and suicide that does not rely on their self-report.”


He adds, “we are hopeful that this line of research ultimately will provide scientists and clinicians with new tools for measuring how people think about sensitive clinical behaviors that they may be unwilling or unable to report on verbally.”


Mahzarin Banaji, also of Harvard University and a co-author of this study, adds that this work presents a strong argument for the importance of funding basic behavioral research.


“These results are an example of basic research helping to solving a troubling and devastating problem in every society. The method we used was designed to understand the mind, but it turned into a technique that can predict disorders of a variety of sorts. One wonders why funding agencies that should know better about the value of basic research seem so naive when it comes to decisions about what is in the public’s interest.”


Source: Association for Psychological Science


http://psychcentral.com/news/2010/04/13/new-research-on-suicidal-behavior/12788.html


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5 Secrets to a Successful Long-Term Relationship or Marriage


By John M. Grohol, Psy.D.

There have been a thousand or more articles written about how to have a successful long-term relationship or marriage, but none that seem to capture some of the core ingredients I’ve found important in relationships. So here’s the straight dope, from my experience.

Before I begin, however, it’s important to dispel a common relationship myth — relationships are (or should be) easy. That is simply not true. The grass always looks greener in other people’s lives, because few people share the truth of the amount of work that goes into relationships (hence why 50% of marriages end in divorce). Relationships — even the best relationships in the world — require constant attention, nurturing, and work. If you can understand and accept the need for constant attention and work in your relationship, you’re started in the right direction.


1. Compromise


Relationships are about not only taking, but also giving. If you find yourself not giving very much, or feeling resentful of how much you give and how little you receive back, you may be in an unequal relationship where one side is taking more than they are giving.


For instance, couples sometimes mistakenly believe that “love” will help them deal with any issue that comes up, and that if the other person truly loved you, they would just do as you ask. But people are independent with their own unique needs and personalities. Just because we found someone we want to spend our lives with doesn’t mean we give up our own identity in the process.


2. Communicate


Relationships live and die not by the sword, but by the amount of discussion. If two people can’t find a way to openly and honestly communicate their needs and feelings to one another, the relationship doesn’t stand much of a chance long-term. Couples must find a way to communicate regularly, openly, and directly.


This doesn’t mean waiting for an argument to tell your significant other how much he bothers you with his throwing his clothes on the floor instead of the hamper. It means telling him when you feel the need to, and to do so in a manner that is respectful but assertive.


3. Choose Your Battles Carefully


After marriage or when two people move in together, couples tend to discover pretty much the same thing no matter who they are – that they are two different people and living together is harder than anyone ever told them. Love conquers a lot of things, but it is no match for living day-in and day-out with another human being (especially if you’ve spent years on your own).


Prepare yourself for this challenge by choosing what arguments you want to turn into a full blown battle. For instance, do you really want to start a fight over the toothpaste cap or how clean the shower is? Or would you rather reserve your energy for the discussions over finances, kids, and career paths (you know, the things that might really matter to a person). Too many couples fight and bicker over the dumbest things, especially when put into context of issues of true importance.


4. Don’t Hide Your Needs


Sometimes when we enter into a long-term relationship, we put ourselves second, behind the other person’s needs and desires. We might give up working to have a child, or agree to move to another city to help support our significant other’s career. And that’s fine, but you need to be realistic first with yourself about whether such things really matter to you or not. If they do, you need to find a way to communicate such needs with your partner, and compromise where possible.


Two people will rarely have exactly the same wants and desires out of life — that’s just a fantasy. Instead, expect that sometimes your two paths will diverge. Express your needs at those crucial moments, but always find a way to do so respectfully and with an open mind.


5. Don’t underestimate the importance of trust and honesty


Different people have different areas of concern, but almost everyone values trust and honesty from their partner above all. Why? Because your partner is the one person you want to be able to depend upon in the long-term, without question or doubt.


Little things where your significant other hasn’t been completely honest shouldn’t be blown out of proportion, because virtually everybody tells little white lies (especially when one is dating). Focus instead on the big things, like if they say they’re a lawyer and you discover they’ve never even passed the bar, or they say they like kids but later on insist on never having one.


* * *

Strong relationships are like a really good conversation with someone you admire, trust and cherish – they are ever-changing, engaging, wonderfully rewarding and sometimes surprising. But in order to continue the conversation because you want to see what the person has to say next, you have to respect your significant other’s opinion even when you disagree with it.


And just like a good conversation, you need to work on keeping your end up too. You need to show attention and nurture the relationship constantly, just as you would nurture anything you value in life. You don’t just “get married” and that’s the end of it. Indeed, marriage is just the beginning of a long process of learning to openly and honestly communicate with another person in a respectful and caring manner.


If you’re up for it and follow these tips, you’ll be on a road to having a more successful relationship or marriage. But remember — it takes two to tango. Share these with your significant other or spouse and use it as an opportunity to begin the conversation of your life.


Source: http://psychcentral.com/lib/2007/5-secrets-to-a-successful-long-term-relationship-or-marriage/2/


In A Good Relationship, Partners Provide Mirroring


By Leigh Pretnar Cousins, MS

I’m taking a break from talking about mental illness, but I’ll be back to it soon!

I’ve been in a good, committed love relationship for a while now, and though I’ve also been happy during my single periods, being half of a couple makes me feel especially good in so many ways.


This weekend, I recalled the following reply from a happily married man when he was asked what was great about being married (though I can’t recall what book it came from):


The best thing about having a partner is that I don’t have to reinvent myself every morning.


There’s something so precious about being recognized, about having that special person who sees you, knows you, confirms you.


In his theory of Self psychology, Kohut described mirroring as one of the three poles of Self needs, essential to maintaining a healthy self-image and feelings of balance and well-being.


Even as adults, with our identities formed, we still need regular doses of empathic mirroring, positive feedback that reminds us of who we are, and that we are valued.


Of course people, single and married, can and do also get their mirroring needs met from other sources.


But there’s something especially satisfying about a love relationship that is working well and answering the mirroring needs of both partners, providing them with feelings of completeness and security and well-being.


Look at some of the ways we seek mirroring in relationships:


  • *When we meet someone new, we delight in discovering the things we have in common.
  • *We often exaggerate the commonalities and minimize the differences and may be disappointed later.
  • *We search for our “soulmate,” for the person who will “complete” us.
  • *We may try to change our partners so that they are more like us.
  • *We may dress alike, eat from the same plate, create all sorts of customs and gestures which suggest twins (mirror images of each other).

A good relationship helps support the psychological needs of both partners. Ideally both partners reflect positive-yet-accurate images of each other, providing strength and clarity. Good partners are like your favorite mirror, the one that casts your features in a flattering, yet undistorted manner.


Source:  http://blogs.psychcentral.com/always-learning/2010/03/in-a-good-relationship-partners-provide-mirroring/


Online Dating Behavior Similar to Real Life


By Rick Nauert PhD Senior News Editor
Reviewed by John M. Grohol, Psy.D. on March 4, 2010


A researcher has found that people who lie on online dating services are people-pleasers who want to present themselves in the most favorable light to get someone to like them.


Interestingly, the behavior would be the same if the individuals were dating in the traditional, face-to-face manner.


Jeffrey Hall, a University of Kansas researcher and assistant professor of communication studies, surveyed more than 5,000 participants in a national Internet matchmaking service to determine what kinds of people are most likely to lie during the online dating process.


He asked them how likely they were to lie about topics such as assets, relationship goals, personal interests, personal attributes, past relationships, age and weight.


“What people lie about depends on what kind of people they are,” Hall said.


“For example, if you’re an extrovert, you might downplay the number of past relationships you’ve had because chances are you’ve had more relationships than an introvert.”


Those most likely to lie during online dating experiences are “high self-monitors” — people who have an acute sense of what people like and control their behavior to achieve social ends. Their actions are not necessarily manipulative, Hall said, but rather reflect a desire to be liked and to fit in.


Hall’s research was published in the February issue of the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships.


The journal also produced a podcast with Hall, which can be found here.


In the study, men admitted to lying more overall, but women were most likely to lie about their weight. Because online daters hope to meet face-to-face eventually, the amount of lying is quite small, Hall said.


“Online daters shouldn’t be concerned that most people are presenting a false impression of themselves,” Hall said.


“What influences face-to-face dating influences the online world, too.”


Source: Kansas University


http://psychcentral.com/news/2010/03/04/online-dating-behavior-similar-to-real-life/11868.html


By Susan Love

I have a confession to make.


I pay hard-earned money to meet virtual men.


What’s wrong with me?!


Absolutely nothing. I’m cute (I swear!), in shape, have an interesting job, have interesting hobbies and tons of friends. Yet, I’m still single.


I had a serious live-in boyfriend for several years in my early twenties, and so, while my single friends were out meeting men in bars and partying, I was picking out paint chips in Home Depot and installing new light fixtures in the house. When that relationship ended (amicably, I might add), I was 26 and my once single friends were spending weekends picking out paint chips instead of going out with me!


Being Single Again


I embraced my singleness, and went date-less for almost a year. I didn’t have time to even worry about meeting men – I was too busy doing things that got tossed by the wayside while I was in that relationship. I hung out with my girlfriends again, planned my 10-year high school reunion, tried my hand at surfing and explored the world in my kayak.


After a year, a nice guy at a State Park helped me load my kayak onto my car and asked me out. I’m a sucker for guys who are willing to carry things, so I said yes and we dated for a couple of months. There were no real sparks with the guy, but it was a nice introduction back into the world of dating. He was the only guy who would ask me out until I started Internet dating a year and a half later.


I did not start dating online because I was lonely or desperate. It was more like a dare! One fateful night, one of my still single girlfriends was in the dumps about not having a boyfriend. After several adult beverages, I convinced her to stop feeling sorry for herself, be proactive and put a profile on one of the Internet dating sites. She didn’t want to be one of “those losers” so II promised her that if she did it, I would do it too. So I too, became a “loser.”


Jumping Into Online Dating


That was two and a half years ago. Just for giggles, I ran the numbers.


I have been single for five years. I have gone on dates with 19 different men during that time. I don’t know if that’s a good number or not, but it works out to 3.8 dates a year, which sounds pretty pathetic if you ask me. But it gets worse. I met 16 of these men online. Without the Internet, my average number of dates would have been 0.6 per year. A half a date per year!


Listen, Internet dating has definitely spiced up my life. I have emailed and talked to two or three times as many men as I have actually gone on a date with. There is always a little rush of adrenaline when someone new emails you, or you email someone and they actually respond. “Shopping for boys” becomes a game and something fun to do on a boring Wednesday night. My friends and co-workers have been fascinated by the steady (if slow) stream of new guys I go out with.


Most of the men I have met in person after chatting on the internet have been nice, interesting, attractive, or some combination of all three. I’ve dated tall guys, short guys, round guys, skinny guys, a juice-maker, an accountant, a psychologist, a developer, a guy who runs his truck with vegetable oil from the Chinese place across from his house, sci-fi fans, Christians, Jews, atheists, PhDs, and pot-smokers. I developed two serious relationships, one with talk of marriage. Some, I saw only once, but most were interesting or amusing enough that we went out at least twice.


Let’s compare this to the men I met in person: the golf course manager who was a friend of a friend, the guy who carried my kayak and a guy I know from work who is much older than me and a bit lonely. Because I at least had a conversation with them all before going out with them, I did go out with all of these guys more than once. But serious relationship material, these men were not.


What’s My Point?


Meeting new people on the Internet has enriched my life. I have learned new and interesting things from most of the guys I have been out with. I have experienced new things. Because I have been able to date so many diverse men, I have learned more about myself and what I want from my life and my relationships. I think, I hope, that this will help me embrace the “real thing” if it ever comes along.


Source:  http://psychcentral.com/lib/2006/confessions-of-an-online-dating-woman-reflections/


Hooking Up vs. Dating


By Rick Nauert PhD Senior News Editor
Reviewed by John M. Grohol, Psy.D. on April 8, 2010


A new study explores the gender preference of two different forms of dating common on university campuses.


Although both genders perceive similar benefits and risks to dating and hooking up, more women than men continue to prefer dating whereas more men than women rate hooking up above dating.


Traditional dating follows a predictable pattern whereby the man is active − he asks the woman to go out with him, organizes the date and at the end of it may initiate sexual activity; whereas the woman is reactive − she waits to be asked out on a date and accepts or rejects the man’s sexual overtures.


They know each other or want to get to know one another and there is the prospect of a future relationship.


In contrast, a hookup is a casual sexual encounter which usually occurs between people who are strangers or brief acquaintances. For instance, two people meet at a party where they have been drinking; they flirt and engage in sexual behaviors from kissing to sexual intercourse, with no commitment to a future relationship.


Carolyn Bradshaw from James Madison University in Virginia and colleagues explored the reasons that motivate college men and women to hook up or to date, as well as the perceived relative benefits and costs of the two practices. Their findings are published online in Springer’s journal Sex Roles.


Bradshaw and team exposed 150 female and 71 male college students from a southern, public American university to a variety of dating or hooking up situations, such as when there was potential for a relationship, when their partner had a great personality and when drinking was involved.


They asked the students the extent to which they would prefer dating or hooking up in each situation.


The participants were also asked to pick the top three benefits and top three risks associated with dating and hooking up from a checklist, as well as provide details of their dating and hooking up activities over the past two years.


Even though men initiated significantly more first dates than women, there was no gender difference in the number of first dates or number of hookups. For both men and women, the number of hookups was nearly double the number of first dates.


Overall, both genders showed a preference for traditional dating over hooking up. However, of those students who strongly preferred traditional dating, there were significantly more women than men (41 percent vs. 20 percent).


Of those who showed a strong preference for hooking up, there were far fewer women than men (2 percent vs. 17 percent).


However, context mattered. When considering the possibility of a long-term relationship, both women and men preferred dating over hooking up; however, when the possibility of a relationship was not mentioned, men preferred hooking up and women preferred dating.


On the whole, men and women agreed on the benefits and risks of dating and hooking up. However, there were some notable differences:


  • *Women more than men seem to want a relationship. They fear, both in dating and hooking up, that they will become emotionally attached to a partner who is not interested in them.
  • *Men more than women seem to value independence. They fear that even in hooking-up relationships, which are supposed to be free of commitments, a woman might seek to establish a relationship.

Source: Springer


http://psychcentral.com/news/2010/04/08/hooking-up-vs-dating/12683.html


My Problems with First Dates and Rudeness


By Leigh Pretnar Cousins, MS

I used to be a professional matchmaker, and I’m still keenly interested in dating dynamics.

One piece of common “knowledge” so widely accepted that we form jokes and even car commercials around it, is the idea that people can be rapidly judged, within minutes of our meeting them.


There’s a TV commercial running now in which a woman is rescued from a disappointing blind date by her trusty girlfriend (whose car is especially reliable; thank goodness in such a situation! I can’t recall the make of car).


He said he’s an eternal student … of life! reports the bemused dater; she and her gal-pal chuckle as they make rapid tracks away from this self-confessed loser of a man.


I’ve got more than one problem with this mentality, including:


  • *Why is it OK to be rude to someone you’ve just met?
  • *Why is it apparently OK for women to openly label men as losers (in jokes, articles, and their everyday conversations),
  • *Whereas it certainly seems un-OK for men to ever refer to women as losers?

On first dates, people put their best AND worst feet forward.


Eager to present themselves in the best possible light, and pumped up with rationalizations to counteract insecurity and nervousness, people typically don’t realize the negatives they are also showing.


During my years as a professional matchmaker, the most frustrating thing to observe was how rapidly people discarded each other. It was as if they were sorting through racks of clothing on sale … not this one, not that one, nope, nope, nope …


It was hard to watch this process. I liked my clients. I cared about them. I invested lots of time in getting to know each and every one of them. To me, they were people.


But to each other, they seemed to be … what?


  • *Prospective job candidates?
  • *Merchandise?
  • *Objects?

I love the fact that meeting new people is easier than ever. Thanks to the Internet it’s now so much easier even than when I had my dating service, way back in the 1980s!


But I do worry about the callousness towards, the objectifying of, human beings.


As one Internet dating site reminds us, there are plenty of fish in the sea.


But what does this mean about how we treat each individual “fish” we encounter?


What does it do to us, psychologically and morally, to have so many dating choices?


Source:  http://blogs.psychcentral.com/always-learning/2010/04/my-problems-with-first-dates-and-rudeness/


Sex Without Romance Is Dangerous


By Rick Nauert PhD Senior News Editor
Reviewed by John M. Grohol, Psy.D. on April 5, 2010


Researchers are investigating a major shift in the United States toward nonromantic partnerships – a behavior that could have far-reaching psychological and physical risks.


A University of Iowa study found that one-third of sexual relationships in the Chicago area lack exclusivity. One in 10 men and women reported that both they and their partner had slept with other people.


Lovers in “friends with benefits” situations or those “hooking up” with a stranger or acquaintance proved much more likely to have multiple partners, according to the survey of 783 heterosexual adults.


Researchers are interested in the topic because concurrent partnerships speed up the spread of sexually transmitted diseases, said Anthony Paik, author of the study published in the latest issue of the journal Perspectives on Sexual and Reproductive Health.


“The United States has seen a major shift toward nonromantic sexual partnerships — people becoming sexually involved when they are just casually dating or not dating at all,” Paik said.


“A quarter of the respondents became sexually involved while casually dating and a fifth did so as friends or acquaintances.”


Respondents, ranging in age from 18 to 60, were asked how many people they had been with during their most recent relationship. They also estimated how many partners their partner had during that time.


Sexual involvement was defined as genital contact.


Overall, 17 percent of men and 5 percent of women acknowledged that they had been with someone else.


Another group — 17 percent of women and 8 percent of men — said they’d been exclusive but their partner had not. Twelve percent of women and 10 percent of men said neither of them had been monogamous.


Being involved with a friend increased the likelihood of nonmonogamy by 44 percent for women and 25 percent for men. Involvement with an acquaintance or stranger increased the odds by 30 percent for women and 43 percent for men.


The study also found that respondents who got along with each other’s parents were less likely to have multiple sex partners.


Paik said people are less likely to risk a relationship when they take family stakeholders into consideration.


Paik said the research does not lead to the conclusion that efforts should be made to revive dating.


“People can make their own choices, but we hope this information will be useful as they weigh the risks and rewards of nonromantic sexual relationships,” he said.


“We encourage people be aware of the potential for sexual concurrency and take appropriate precautions to avoid sexually transmitted infections.”


Source: University of Iowa


http://psychcentral.com/news/2010/04/05/sex-without-romance-is-dangerous/12586.html


Dating Later in Life


By Chris Green

“At first, I felt like I was being unfaithful to my late husband,” says Paula, a 65-year-old widow who recently began dating again. Sam, a 70-year-old retiree, wants to date, “But my grown kids don’t think it’s such a great idea for a man my age.”


Like Paula and Sam, many seniors think about dating, but question doing so in light of past relationships, family concerns or health issues. Dating later in life, however, can be rewarding, offering seniors the attention, companionship, affection and support people of all ages long for.


Why date now?


Admittedly, your reasons for dating now may differ from those you had in your youth — but the human need for intimacy and companionship does not change, no matter what your age. You may be content being single or satisfied with your current social circle, but you also may seek a degree of intimacy that is not being met by your friends and family. Sharing life experiences, such as the joy of grandparenting or the grief associated with a loved one’s death, with someone at the same stage of life can be enriching. Or perhaps you miss the passion and emotional investment romantic relationships can offer.


Dating later in life also can be just plain fun. Now that you enjoy freedom from the responsibilities of raising a family and maintaining a household, you can take a risk and pursue new relationships. Plus, relationships between men and women today are more equitable, honest and open, and society is more tolerant of relationships that cross ethnic, racial or religious lines.


Overcoming obstacles


Letting go and saying goodbye to past relationships is the key to enjoying dating. Remove reminders that hinder you from moving on, such as your wedding band or keepsakes on display in your home. Doing so does not mean that you are forgetting a loved one. It just means that you can see beyond what was and to the potential for future relationships.


Grown children sometimes object to a parent dating later in life. Do not be embarrassed by your desire to see other people in a romantic or intimate way. Ask your children for their support, but do not yield to their wishes.


You may think your physical condition or health problems are reasons to not date. But such concerns can and do happen at any age. Plus, through dating, you will meet other people who, like you, are coping with the inevitable aging process. You will appreciate having friends to support and empathize with you through this stage of life.


The singles scene all over


Finding people to date is not difficult if you look for everyday opportunities and are willing to take a chance. Consider meeting others through:


  • *Online dating sites
  • *Neighbors
  • *Volunteer groups
  • *Clubs and civic organizations
  • *Gyms
  • *Adult education opportunities
  • *Bookstore lectures
  • *Church or synagogue
  • *Travel groups

For the most part, dating is much the same as you remember. Nowadays, however, it is appropriate for women to invite men out, and even pick up or split the bill. One way to help ease the transition is to ask your date for coffee or a walk in the park, outings that generally are shorter and more casual than an evening dinner date. And always use common sense when it comes to safety. Think about alcohol use, sexually transmitted diseases and sharing personal information with strangers.


?Want to learn more about adult dating?
Read our three-part series, Adult Dating: From Attraction to Commitment.


Source:  http://psychcentral.com/lib/2007/dating-later-in-life/


Dating a Divorcee With Kids


By Robert Stone

Dating someone who has a child from a previous marriage introduces many complicated issues. Get your relationship off to a good start by considering these common scenarios.


My date has a son from a previous marriage. Is it OK to meet him now or should I wait until I have a better feel for the potential of this relationship before making introductions? If all goes well, how should I get to know him?


Most experts agree that you should wait until your relationship shows signs of becoming serious before making introductions. Children (especially young children) quickly can become attached to someone new and, consequently, may be confused or hurt if the relationship ends. If your date wants you to meet her son right away, suggest that she introduce you as a friend.


You may consider bringing the child a small gift to show your good will and sincere interest in him, such as baseball cards for a collector or new crayons for an aspiring artist. Don’t bring anything extravagant, which he may perceive as an effort to buy his affection.


Once your relationship becomes somewhat serious, try to get to know her son gradually, without attempting to rush or force the relationship or stepping in as a parental figure. Plan an outing that is fun and that requires minimal interaction. Go ice skating, take a day hike, visit the zoo or attend a sporting event. Activities such as those offer low-pressure ways of becoming acquainted with each other. Ask the child for help planning-requesting his opinion can help get the relationship off to a good start.


I’m really starting to like this guy I’ve been dating. But, I’m reluctant to meet his daughter. I’ve heard that a divorcee’s child can make dating the parent a real challenge. What kind of reactions can I expect from his daughter?


You may be surprised by her immediate acceptance. But more than likely, she will be upset by your relationship. Many children of divorced parents still have a lingering hope that their parents will reunite, and you are a sign that her parent’s relationship really is over. Common reactions to a new relationship include resentment, fear, jealousy and competitiveness.


Much of how your date’s daughter will react depends on her age. Generally, younger children are more accepting of new relationships. Adolescents, however, may have more trouble. This age is just beginning to understand sexuality, and often preteens have trouble dealing with their own sexuality, let alone the idea that their parents are sexual beings, too.


Although the child at first may refuse to bond with you, over time (maybe even over a year), you can build a relationship. Sticking around is the best way to show your date’s child that you intend to be there through thick and thin.


I want to begin spending the night at my girlfriend’s, but fear that doing so will compromise my relationship with her daughters.


You and your girlfriend should talk seriously about this next step. If possible, consider sleeping over when her children are not at home or are elsewhere. Only after a relationship is very serious should you consider exposing the children to this side of your relationship. By waiting, you will show the children that sex is not to be taken casually and that it should be reserved for only serious, loving relationships.


Source:  http://psychcentral.com/lib/2007/dating-a-divorcee-with-kids/


Modern Love: Ways Women Can be More Assertive


By Jane Collingwood

It’s not long ago that men were expected to do all the chasing and make all the decisions when it comes to dating. But how much has this changed in the 21st century?


A survey by DatingDirect.com suggests a new trend — women are becoming sassy and assertive, while men are remaining more traditional in their approach to courtship.


In the survey of over 2,000 people, women reported being less shy on dates than men (29 per cent versus 44 per cent), and making more effort with their appearance — half choose smart, sexy clothes on a first date, whereas 78 per cent of men go for the casual and relaxed look. Women also like to keep the finances on an equal footing. Seventy per cent prefer to split the expense of a date, or pay for themselves. However, 52 per cent of men believe it’s their time honoured duty to pay.


Darren Richards of DatingDirect.com concludes: “The rules of dating may be changing for some, but the concept is still as popular as ever.”


But what might be stopping you from taking the first step? Sometimes even very intelligent, funny, confident women don’t ask guys out because they believe that “it’s the man’s role”, or they fear rejection, scaring men off, or appearing too keen. But there is a whole generation of men who want women to make the first move, and feel that women should embrace the power and independence they now have. And in fact, some guys are just too shy, or don’t know what to say, or think that you won’t be interested.


But perhaps your lifestyle doesn’t bring you into contact with potential new partners. So consider widening your social circle — take up a new class, try out new clubs, get involved in political or volunteer activities. Also, don’t discount your current social network, because often friends, family and work colleagues are more than willing to help and will set up introductions if asked.


Other possible avenues include personal ads in newspapers and more specialized dating services to cater for your specific hobbies or preferences, guaranteeing that you share at least one common interest.


These days, the internet is increasingly used by modern singles to search for a compatible date. So join in discussion groups, forums and chat groups and put your dating skills into action. And in the arena of internet dating, women can be as forward as they like and either side can make the first move. Men report that they are perfectly happy to be approached by women and their supposed “male pride” isn’t hurt at all — quite the contrary!


In many ways, online dating is the ideal way to meet someone suitable, as you can quickly get to know a great deal about a person at no risk to yourself. It’s no small thing to be aware of the other person’s outlook on life, religion, sense of humor etc. before meeting up in person. Chatting in a safe environment encourages honesty and therefore compatibility, so may prevent a wide range of problems occurring further down the line.


Internet dating also avoids the potential problems of dating work colleagues or other people you will inevitable continue to see socially, and it puts you in control of your future without even leaving your front door!


Experts recommend getting to know the other person well via email or over the phone before actually going on a date. The more you know about each other, the easier the conversation will flow. They also suggest remaining anonymous until you feel confident enough to share your contact details (the dating service will have its own internal messaging system). And don’t cast your net too wide geographically or you’ll run up against practical difficulties later.


When setting up a first date, choose a public place such as a restaurant, cinema or museum. If you’re concerned about seeming too ‘forward’, you could invite the guy to something you are going to anyway, like a concert, so it’s like you are asking them to come along.


Tell a trusted friend your plans and arrange your own transport. Then it’s a case of picking up on the cues to your compatibility, so trust your instincts and don’t drink too much. Remember there will always be other dates so there’s no need to settle for second best.


If the date goes well, don’t wait for the guy to call you – let them know you had a good time. This doesn’t have to be a plea to see them again right away. It’s simply a courtesy. If your date had an enjoyable time too, it will be icing on the cake!
Too often, life is a case of “what ifs” and maybes, so if you really like someone, then you have to do something about it. Ultimately, what is there to lose? A bit of pride that can be replaced with a cheap bottle of wine. The answer is easy — take the initiative. You have nothing to gain by waiting, and if it doesn’t work out then you’ll know they weren’t right for you, with no regrets.


Source:  http://psychcentral.com/lib/2006/modern-love-ways-women-can-be-more-assertive/


How Do You Get Your Needs Met?


By Stanley J. Gross, Ed.D

How do you respond to other people? Do you know the difference between assertion and aggression? Is it ever appropriate to be aggressive or submissive? Which style do you favor?


While growing up, we learn three styles for meeting our needs: assertion, submission, and aggression. Each style is necessary for dealing with the variety of situations we experience. Problems emerge, however, when we are submissive or aggressive in situations that call for assertion.


When inappropriately submissive, we deny our own needs and rely on the good will of others or their need to control to meet these needs.


When we are in the submissive mode, it is difficult to say “no” when something does not suit us.


When inappropriately aggressive, we deny the needs of others and may abuse the very people who can meet our needs for caring and affection.


When we are in the aggressive mode, it is difficult to stay calm and simply say, “I am angry” if someone invades our space. We will, more likely, fly into a rage to express our displeasure.


Three Response Styles


Submissive behavior may be necessary or advisable when it is physically dangerous or socially inappropriate to express oneself more directly. Submissiveness is a problem, however, if it is our usual way of responding to others. Submissive behavior seeks to avoid conflict, risky situations, and confusion. Our communication is emotionally dishonest when we do not directly express our thoughts, feelings, and desires. We may withhold entirely or express ourselves indirectly. We may say “yes” to others when we want to say “no.”


Submissiveness as a lifestyle revolves around the belief that our rights to personal space or to engage in efforts to meet our personal needs are subject to the approval of others. When we are prevented from getting what we require, we may try to meet our needs in a passive-aggressive manner, or by withholding, guilt, manipulation, or sneakiness.


When we are submissive, we may blame ourselves for this perceived denial of rights and attempt to calm the situation with apologies or by talking around the point. We may agree to do things we really do not want to do. Allowing violations of boundaries, denial of rights, and exploitation, coupled with an ignorance of our own needs, are all part of a pattern of avoiding conflict and gaining the approval of others. “You” statements, which proclaim innocence and blame others, and assumptions that others should meet our needs, avoid personal vulnerability and responsibility. A reduced sense of “being alive,” unsatisfactory relationships, low self-esteem, martyrdom, negativity, disappointment, hurt, not getting what we want, and periodic outbursts of rage are characteristic consequences of submissiveness.


Read More …  http://psychcentral.com/lib/2006/how-do-you-get-your-needs-met/


Real-Life Communities Benefit From Online Interactions


Article Date: 07 Apr 2010 – 0:00 PDT


If you think Facebook, Twitter and other Web sites that foster online communication and interaction are merely vapid echo chambers of self-promotion, think again, say two University of Illinois professors who study computer-mediated communication and the Internet.


According to Caroline Haythornthwaite and Lori Kendall, professors in the Graduate School of Library and Information Science at Illinois, online interactions not only have positive outcomes for real-life, place-based communities, but the intersection between online communication and the offline world also forms two halves of a support mechanism for communities.


Previously, most attention was paid to highly virtual, online-only experiences. But as information and communication technologies have become increasingly intertwined with everyday life, the Internet and social media have combined to create a vibrant and indispensable communication and information platform and infrastructure for today’s world.


“In its earliest incarnation, the online world was considered a separate realm, and it was not viewed as a serious venue for work or business,” Haythornthwaite said. “But as more people have come online, the more online communication has become the norm. So it isn’t thought of as a separate realm anymore, but as one that merges and overlaps with our daily activities.”


From social networking, to civic participation, to community support during emergencies, to providing on-the-ground information in disaster areas, the professors say that the rapid development and widespread use of online technologies – for communicating and networking, for contributing and distributing content, and for storing, sharing and retrieving files – are creating ties that bind for offline communities.


“Research on who people communicate with online shows a lot of local activity,” Haythornthwaite said. “So online communication always reinforces local relationships and local identities that build networks of interacting individuals who are mutually aware of each other. Together, this demonstrates a continuous change in how we maintain local community, while also emphasizing the importance and significance of our attachments to local places and spaces.”


Although there are still a considerable number of people who go online to build new, non-local friendships, there are also people who go online for a specific purpose – to research information about breast cancer, for example – and, incidentally, form relationships as a result.


“While people can go to a site for information and personal support, they have also formed some long-term relationships with others they’ve met there and communicated with,” Kendall said. “So both things are happening, but I would say there’s probably more contact online with locals, and more searches for local information.”


“What has been growing over the years is a stronger, Internet-enabled connection to the geographically-based community,” Haythornthwaite said. “We’ve evolved from one-to-one or small group communication to whole ‘community’ communication.”


From crowdsourcing for information to citizen journalism, the participatory culture that exists online, where people will work for free, is an extremely important trend, both socially and economically, the professors say.


“Socially, the Internet provides a platform for just about anyone to contribute, and everyone benefits by having many different angles on a news event or topic,” Haythornthwaite said.


“Economically, the ease of publishing Web pages challenges traditional publishing, which we can see played out in the battle between the traditional news media and blogs, news aggregators and Twitter,” she said.


Emerging and evolving uses of information and communication technologies only serve to reinforce and regenerate geographically-based community identities, the professors say. With the ubiquity of Internet-enabled cell phones with cameras, the mobile Internet provides a low effort, just-in-time, virtual printing press, making anyone a writer, editor and publisher of hyperlocal news.


“I think the use of cell phones to access the Web is a bigger factor in connecting the Internet to a local geographical community than the World Wide Web has been,” Kendall said.


Whether they’re posting a status update to Facebook, sending out a tweet from Twitter, or uploading photos to Flickr, “people have a cell phone with them in physical space, and they connect that physical space to the Internet when they use their cell phones for Internet access,” she said.


Does all this focus on the local bleed into myopic provincialism?


“I think it’s more of the online communities than the local ones that become parochial,” Haythornthwaite said. “As individuals join communities of interest, they increasingly join communities of people who are like them – same interests, same background. Offline, or outside of our geographically-based community identities, we’re more exposed to new people and ideas.”


“It’s very possible for people to ignore opinions they don’t like and talk only to people they agree with online,” Kendall said. “Offline is often messier. To the extent that you’re going to get involved with your local community and your neighbors, you’re going to have to hash out disagreements and deal with a wide range of identities, experiences, and opinions.


“To a certain degree, all communities are ‘imagined communities’ – that is, our sense of being part of a community is always something we must create in ourselves, and it often occurs through media.”


Haythornthwaite and Kendall’s article, “Internet and Community,” is published in the April 2010 issue of American Behavioral Scientist.


Source:
Phil Ciciora
University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign


http://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/184579.php


The Challenge of Long-Distance Relationships


By Marie Hartwell-Walker, Ed.D.


More and more young couples are struggling with launching two separate careers at the same time that they are launching a relationship or a marriage together. Having spent endless hours with each other in college, grad school or during a first job, they feel ready to commit to each other. Having focused time and intent on a career-in-the-making, they feel equally committed to their vocations. Often enough, the first rung of the ladder at their respective careers is in different cities. So,being Generation Yers — modern, forward thinking, and ambitious — they decide that a few years of distance won’t hurt. After all, they are meant for each other. They are meant for their jobs. And they are meant to have both.


Maybe.


The strains on a long-distance relationship are many and intense. Frequently, couples in this situation quote “absence makes the heart grow fonder” as a way of reassuring themselves and each other that their love will sustain them over the difficulties of distance and time. But unless both partners are committed to doing the very hard work of being together alone, their relationship will soon fall to another, equally common saying: “Out of sight, out of mind.” The immediate demands of work and the availability of attractive, available singles can, and regularly do, overwhelm good intentions and even love.


What can a couple do to preserve their love and relationship over the miles? Here are some key characteristics of couples that make it.


Both members of the couple are committed to the commitment. All relationships have their ups and downs. All relationships have times when one or the other partner feels held back, misunderstood, not given enough, left in the dust, or any of a whole host of less-than-wonderful feelings. The couples that make it, whether they live together or apart, are those that understand that this is a natural part of a long-term commitment. Working through difficult times usually strengthens and betters the relationship.


The long-distance couple is especially challenged during these times. When people live together, there are hundreds of little opportunities every day to connect, to reassure, to touch, to pick up a conversation that was too hard to finish an hour ago, to try again and again. The long distance couple needs to take the time to phone, to e-mail, to stay in contact even when it would be so much easier and more pleasant not to.


Both members keep their partners visible to the people around them, as well as to themselves. Couples who live together generally share at least some friends, go home to each other at the end of the day, and make references to each other quite often, just because it’s a natural part of the day. They may not realize it, but being so visibly “coupled” helps create a context for themselves within their community and workplaces that helps to maintain the couple. People around them see them as part of a couple, not as single and available.


The colleagues and friends of a person in a long-distance relationship aren’t as apt to see their friend as part of a couple because the couple isn’t visible. It falls on each member of the couple to make it happen anyway. Pictures on the desk, references to phone calls and conversations, stories about the partner, and introducing the partner to everyone during visits are all ways that a person makes it clear that he or she is “coupled.” The result is support for the relationship.


Read More …  http://psychcentral.com/lib/2006/the-challenge-of-long-distance-relationships/


Finding a long lost friend: Let me count the ways


Rediscovering an old friend can truly be a treasure


Superhero schoolboy Josh Shipman receives congratulations from Huttoft Primary School head teacher Alison Hurrell, left, NHS Trust representative Mel Wright, middle, and his mother Mandy Shipman. Photo www.stevegould.co.uk
 Superhero schoolboy Josh Shipman receives congratulations from Huttoft Primary School head teacher Alison Hurrell, left, NHS Trust representative Mel Wright, middle, and his mother Mandy Shipman. Photo www.stevegould.co.uk

 

08 April 2010 By Robert Rachow

Thursday, 6pm: AUTISTIC six-year-old Josh Shipman has had confirmed to him what his family already knew.

Josh is now officially a hero.

Four months after saving mum Mandy’s life at their Chapel St Leonards home, the young tearway has been awarded a bravery certificate from the National Health Service (NHS) Trust.

Presented the certificate in front of his classmates at Huttoft Primary School, Josh was lauded for being ‘exceptionally brave in exceptional circumstances’.

Despite his natural aversion to strangers, Josh knew to call a family friend and then assist ambulance officers when Mandy went into diabetic shock one night early last December.

The schoolboy clearly remembered instructions his mother had told him, to use the speed dial should there ever be a medical emergency.

“He was the only person in the house who could help and he did extremely well,” declared NHS Trust spokeswoman Mel Wright.

“Ambulance crew gave their instructions through the letterbox and once they reassured him who they were, he slid the keys through to them.”

The East Midlands Ambulance Service used the presentation to Josh as a way to remind other Huttoft students of the correct procedures to take in an emergency, including dialling 999.

Students were shown how to check if someone was breathing by monitoring movement in their ribcage and placing their hand near their face to feel for hot air.

Josh, who not only has autism, but also attention deficit hyperactivity disorder and mild Tourette’s Syndrome, received an extra gift in the shape of a Para-Teddy, a paramedic teddy bear.

Last December the Shipman’s were the beneficiaries of outstanding generosity from the Skegness Rotary and Lions clubs, as well as the Alive and Kicking disability support group.

The organisations raised enough funds to send Josh to Lapland in Finland to complete his dream of visiting Santa Claus in his home country.

Source: http://www.skegnessstandard.co.uk/news/Josh-is-rewarded-for-his.6214501.jp



  Young, Autistic & Stgestruck

(London, UK) Channel 4 are to televise a new series directed by David Dehaney called ‘Young, Autistic and Stagestruck.’ The Channel 4 series follows nine autistic youngsters as they try to produce their own stage show, guided by theatre professionals.These professionals have never worked with a cast of young people who are all on the autism spectrum.

The first episode of the series introduces the first five youngsters. Twelve-year-old Ben has high functioning autism: he’s exceptionally bright but experiences acute loneliness. But as the project develops he starts to bond successfully with the other youngsters.

Andrew, 17, is classically autistic, and despite limited social skills, he is very keen to have his first proper relationship with a girl. From day one he starts getting closer to Claire, 19, and takes her on the first date of his life: a night at the cinema. Claire is a talented singer and pianist who also struggles socially.

Mollie, 11, is prone to tantrums and lengthy sulks, which test her mother’s considerable patience. She suffers from PDA – Pathological Demand Avoidance – a pervasive developmental disorder with symptoms including mood swings, language delay and obsessive behaviour. A talented singer, Mollie was diagnosed with autism at four.

Eleven-year-old Jozsef is more challenged by his autism, but his playfulness makes him endearing to others and soon turns him into the group joker.

The first episode of ‘Young, Autistic & Stagestruck’ is on Monday 12th April on Channel TV in Britain.

Source:  http://www.bloggernews.net/124255



Castle of Hunedoara, Transylvania

HEADLINES

 

“Mum of Pudsey teenager kicked in head appeals for witnesses”:

http://www.advertiserseries.co.uk/news/5495534._Who_would_do_this_to_my_special__son_Daniel__/

 

“Couple sues over school repeatedly restraining autistic child”:

http://www.tcpalm.com/news/2010/apr/08/palm-beach-co-couple-sues-over-school-repeatedly-r/

 

“Chief questions use of Taser on 10 year-old boy”:

http://www.indystar.com/article/20100402/LOCAL/4020345/Use-of-Taser-on-boy-10-questioned

 

“New TV appeal by missing man’s parents fail”:

http://www.hastingsobserver.co.uk/newshastings/New-TV-appeal-by-missing.6184278.jp

 

[Australia] “Bill Shorten MP: Disability eNews”:

http://aspie-editorial.blog-city.com/bill_shorten_mp_disability_enews.htm

 

“White House remains steadfast in support of Disability Council Nominee, Ari Ne’eman”:

http://aspie-editorial.blog-city.com/white_house_remains_steadfast_in_support_of_ari_neeman.htm

 

[Australia] “Specialist Autism Services launched in Brisbane for children”:

http://aspie-editorial.blog-city.com/australia_specialist_autism_services_launched_in_brisbane_.htm

 

“Support service to start in Devon city for older carers”:

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/devon/8590652.stm

 

Albert Gonzalez Case “Hackers high life brought to an end with 20-year sentence”:

http://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/hackers-high-life-brought-to-end-with-20year-sentence-1929312.html

 

“Charity worker Jonathon Dibb dies aged 36 … From 2007, he worked as a welfare rights advisor with the National Autistic Society. In this role he helped families throughout the country gain access to benefits and allowances they were entitled to. “Jonathan loved his work, and got huge amounts of satisfaction from it,” said Jen. “He took it upon himself to learn a lot about autism for the role and really made it his own.”:

http://www.yorkpress.co.uk/news/5422429.Charity_worker_Jonathan_Dibb_dies_aged_36/

HEALTH & RESEARCH

 

“Autism susceptibility genes identified”:

http://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/183602.php

 

“Songbird genome to treat speech disorders”:

http://aspie-editorial.blog-city.com/songbird_genome_to_treat_speech_disorders.htm

 

“BPS Research Digest: The Special Issue Spotter”:

http://aspie-editorial.blog-city.com/bps_research_digest_the_special_issue_spotter_9.htm

 

“Widely used screening scale may misidentify Borderline Personality Disorder as Bipolar Disorder”:

http://aspie-editorial.blog-city.com/widely_used_screening_scale_may_misidentify_borderline_perso.htm

 

“Disruption in Brain Connection Linked to Genetic Defect in Schizophrenia”:

http://aspie-editorial.blog-city.com/disruption_in_brain_connection_linked_to_genetic_defect_in_s.htm


“Picking our brains: What are mirror neurons?”:

http://www.newscientist.com/article/mg20627541.400-picking-our-brains-what-are-mirror-neurons.html

 

“Persistent Migraine Aura: The Girl with Kaleidoscope Eyes”:

http://aspie-editorial.blog-city.com/persistent_migraine_aura_the_girl_with_kaleidoscope_eyes.htm

 

“PTSD: Cannabis Science Officially Begins its First Pre-IND FDA Application Process for PTSD”:

http://aspie-editorial.blog-city.com/ptsd_cannabis_science_officially_begins_its_first_preind_f.htm

 

“Latest on Depression: Long-Term Treatment of Depression with SSRIs & Newer Antidepressants, Top 10 Signs of Depression, Anesthesia Drugs May Relieve Depression & More …”:

http://aspie-editorial.blog-city.com/latest_on_depression_longterm_treatment_of_depression_with.htm

 

“Latest Depression Research: Genetic Link for Stress Induced Depression?, 7 Strategies To Aid Relapse Recovery, Middle-Aged?, Adoptive Parents & PDD & More …”:

http://aspie-editorial.blog-city.com/latest_depression_research_genetic_link_for_stressinduced_.htm


[Australia] “Psychologist uses Harry Potter books to treat Teen Depression”:

http://aspie-editorial.blog-city.com/psychologist_uses_harry_potter_books_to_treat_teen_depressio.htm


“Exercise ‘Therapy’ for Depression”:

http://aspie-editorial.blog-city.com/exercise_therapy_for_depression.htm

 

“Pilots can take antidepressants while on duty; FAA lifts 70-year-old ban that many ignored”:

http://blog.taragana.com/health/2010/04/02/pilots-can-take-antidepressants-while-on-duty-faa-lifts-70-year-old-ban-that-many-ignored-21270/

 

“Treatment options for Generalized Anxiety Disorder/Massage & Simple Relaxation”:

http://aspie-editorial.blog-city.com/treatment_options_for_generalized_anxiety_disordermassage_.htm

 

“Natural Remedies Ineffective for Anxiety”:

http://aspie-editorial.blog-city.com/natural_remedies_ineffective_for_anxiety.htm

 

“Sleep/Anxiety Matters: A Boy and his Bad Dreams”:

http://www.philly.com/inquirer/health_science/weekly/20100405_Ask_Dan__A_boy_and_his_bad_dreams.html

 

“Cardiac Health and Creative Engagement”:

http://aspie-editorial.blog-city.com/cardiac_health_and_creative_engagement.htm

 

“Happiness: Reach for the Sky for Positive Thoughts, Who Killed Happiness?, Building Strong Internal Resources”:

http://aspie-editorial.blog-city.com/happiness_reach_for_the_sky_for_positive_thoughts_who_kill.htm

 

“Narcissists Who Cry: The Other Side of the Ego”:

http://aspie-editorial.blog-city.com/narcissists_who_cry_the_other_side_of_the_ego.htm

 

“Is Narcissism a Leadership Trait?”:

http://aspie-editorial.blog-city.com/is_narcissism_a_leadership_trait.htm


“Women face Inequality in Professional, Family Lives”:

http://aspie-editorial.blog-city.com/women_face_inequality_in_professional_family_lives.htm

 

“Work Addiction Defined”:

http://aspie-editorial.blog-city.com/work_addiction_defined.htm

 

“Teen Blogging: A Good Thing!”:

http://aspie-editorial.blog-city.com/teen_blogging_a_good_thing.htm

 

“Introducing New Blog: Light, Laughter & Life”:

http://aspie-editorial.blog-city.com/introducing_new_blog_light_laughter__life.htm

 

“Large, Longitudinal Study Finds Tentative Links Between Internet Use & Loneliness”:

http://aspie-editorial.blog-city.com/large_longitudinal_study_finds_tentative_links_between_inte.htm

 

“5 Gifts of Being Highly Sensitive”:

http://aspie-editorial.blog-city.com/5_gifts_of_being_highly_sensitive.htm

 

“Relationships: Controlling Men, Male & Misunderstood, Questions About Marriage, Monogomy, Multiple Relationships & More …”:

http://aspie-editorial.blog-city.com/relationships_controlling_men_male__misunderstood_questi.htm

 

“Virtual Hospital”:

http://www.uihealthcare.com/vh/

EDUCATION

 

“The challenge of change”:

http://www.mb.com.ph/articles/249924/the-challenge-change

 

“Teenage bullying leads to 9 indictments/Bullies’ behavior driven by pursuit of status and affection”:

http://aspie-editorial.blog-city.com/teenage_bullying_leads_to_9_indictmentsbullies_behavior_dr.htm

 

“Bic Kids and the NAS … Bic has made a £15,000 donation to the NAS’s education support service, which helps teachers in mainstream schools who work with autistic pupils.”:

http://www.thirdsector.co.uk/news/Article/992959/Bic-Kids-National-Autistic-Society/

 

“Parents raise concerns with Education Minister”:

http://www.kildare-nationalist.ie/tabId/515/itemId/9862/Parents-raise-concerns-with-Education-Minister.aspx

 

“Education assistants essential”:

http://www.leaderpost.com/opinion/letters/Education+assistants+essential/2719218/story.html

 

“Married with GPAs: Students juggle school, work, families … Dottie Fitzpatrick, a special education senior, 27, is married with two children. Her children have autism, Asperger’s syndrome and Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD), and Fitzpatrick said this led to her decision to go to school and study special education.”:

http://www.statepress.com/2010/03/28/married-with-gpas-college-students-juggle-school-families/

 

“Young Stanwell boy re-accepted on course thanks to Staines News …”:

http://staines.stainesnews.co.uk/2010/03/young-stanwell-boy-re-accepted.html

 

“Kids can be twice exceptional”:

http://www.mydesert.com/article/20100328/LIFESTYLES12/3280346/1026/news12

 

“Everyone’s an actor in this theater group for home-schooled students”:

http://www.goupstate.com/article/20100328/ARTICLES/3281018/1101

EMPLOYMENT

 

[Australia] “Only autistic people need apply”:

http://aspie-editorial.blog-city.com/employment_only_autistic_people_need_apply.htm

 

“I beat trauma of blindness to build £1m firm”:

http://aspie-editorial.blog-city.com/i_beat_trauma_of_blindness_to_build_1m_firm.htm

 

“Flawed benefit system classifies terminally ill man fit for work”:

http://www.guardian.co.uk/society/joepublic/2010/mar/23/employment-support-allowance-incapacity-benefit

 

“Creative Support Ltd”:

http://www.creativesupport.co.uk/


“Autelligent Laboratories

We believe all people have a contribution to make and deserve an opportunity to be productive.

With your caring and excellent help, we are creating jobs for the 40 million people worldwide who are diagnosed with Autism and Asperger Syndrome. Today less than one in five of us are currently employed. We are motivated and competent and we deserve equal employment. Help make this a reality.

Autelligent Laboratories is dedicated to creating a space where autistic software engineers can more than contribute, we can excel.”:

http://www.autlabs.com/

 

Luxury Quality Scented Candles “Humbolt Candles – Autism & Disability Employment Company”:

http://www.humboldtcandles.com/index.html

 

“Auties.org”:
Individuality, Diversity, Equality, Achievement

Auties..org is an Aspie & Autie friendly site for all people on the Autistic Spectrum who are ready to dare reach out to occupation and employment, open the doors to the community and market their abilities directly to the public and for those interested in supporting these pioneers.

http://www.auties.org/

 

“Prospects”:

http://www.nas.org.uk/nas/jsp/polopoly.jsp?d=473&a=2348

 

“AutismJobs”:
Linking job seekers with vacancies in work related to autism, Aspergers and ASDs

http://www.autismjobs.org/?section=00010009

 

“Current job vacancies within the NAS”:

http://www.nas.org.uk/nas/jsp/polopoly.jsp?d=170

 

For further employment information, please view”:

http://aspie-editorial.blog-city.com/employment_on_the_autism_spectrum.htm

GENERAL/HUMAN INTEREST

 

“Stereotypes don’t always apply when it comes to autism”:

http://aspie-editorial.blog-city.com/stereotypes_dont_always_apply_when_it_comes_to_autism.htm

 

“Socialization skills crucial for autistic teens”:

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/36177369/ns/local_news-orange_county_ca/

 

“McNamara: Try to learn more about autism … What can we as a society do to change attitudes about people we may see as being different? First, it is most important to remember that people with ASD are people. Like all of us, there are things they are good at and things at which they are not so good. We all have to find where our particular talents lie and go with them. If Billy Joel, Albert Einstein, Lady GaGa or even Temple Grandin had spent their lives trying to be professional basketball players, they would probably be considered failures. Instead, we celebrate what their unique talents have achieved. Much too often we say “What’s wrong with that person?” when we ought to be saying, “What’s right?” Persons with ASD have made valuable contributions to society and we should focus on developing the different talents and abilities that lie in all of us. ”:

http://www.goerie.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20100331/OPINION08/303319990/-1/RSS

 

“Vive le difference, we say!”:

http://www.shieldsgazette.com/letters/Vive-le-difference-we-say.6184359.jp

 

“Heartbreak over care home”:

http://www.thisishampshire.net/news/5198796._Heartbreak__over_care_home/?ref=rss

 

“Most adoptions from China now special-needs cases”:

http://www.seattlepi.com/national/1110ap_us_special_needs_adoptions.html

 

“The Autism Project”:

http://impactnews.com/round-rock-pflugerville/148-nonprofit-profile/7735-the-autism-project

 

“How do you know when your child is ready to live independently? (Part 1)”:

http://www.examiner.com/x-36055-Hartford-Disability-Examiner~y2010m3d25-Disability-101-How-do-you-know-when-your-child-is-ready-to-live-independently-part-1

 

“How do you know when your child is ready to live independently? (part 2)”:

http://www.examiner.com/x-36055-Hartford-Disability-Examiner~y2010m3d28-Disability-101-How-do-you-know-when-your-child-is-ready-to-live-independently-part-2

ROMANIA

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Romania

Autism Romania – Association of Parents of Children with Autism
Postal address: OP9 CP95 Bucharest
Street address: Apele Vii Street, 28
6th district, Bucharest
ROMANIA
tel: +40 21 424 7388
fax: + 40 21 230 3614
e-mail:
contact@autismromania.ro or president@autismromani.ro
Website:
http://www.autismromania.ro

Romanian Sunset

Romanian Sunset

Asociatia Romana pentru Copli Autisti (ARCA)
ROMANIA
contact Jules Janssen at the ICA in Germany
tel: 31-4493-4711

Alba, Romania

Alba, Romania

Foundation Pentru Voi
47 Ioan Slavici St.,
Timisoara, 300521
ROMAINIA
Tel: 0040.256.228.062, 0040.356.421.216,
Tel/Fax: 0040.356.421.215
Email:
pentruvoi@pentruvoi.ro
Website:
www.pentruvoi.ro

Bucharest

Bucharest

“ANED – Romania: Facts & Figures Re Disability, Reports on Employment, Social Inclusion & Protection, Resources, Organisations & More”:

http://www.disability-europe.net/en/countries/Romania?jsEnabled=1

Corvin Castle

Corvin Castle, Hunedoara, Romania
This castle is one of the most important well preserved Gothic castles in Europe. It was built on top of an old Roman fortress with an interesting history, having the known connection of Vlad the Impaler or the historical Dracula who was imprisoned for 7 years in this castle.

“Prospects – In Romania”:

http://www.prospects.org.uk/index.php/international_prospects/3/11

Arad

Orthodox Cathedral in Arad

“Save the Children Romania”:

http://www.savethechildren.net/romania_en/ce_facem/programe/dizabilitati_program.html

Town Hall, Oradea

Town Hall, Oradea, Transylvania

“BAAF – The Opening Doors Disability Project”:

http://www.baaf.org.uk/about/projects/openingdoors/

Small Village, Romania

Small Village, Romania: This picture was taken in Romania, in a small village that only has a couple of houses and a little Church that is deeply buried into the autumn coloured trees…all at the bottom of the Carpathian mountains.

“AlertNet – Rights of children with disabilities left unfulfilled for too long”:

http://www.alertnet.org/thenews/fromthefield/wvmeero/7bcfadc2b6d94ebf4a2e1010cbfcff38.htm

Sighisoara, Romania

Sighisoara, Romania

“Hope and Homes for Children – Romania”:

http://www.hopeandhomes.org/wherewehelp/romania/index.html

Traditional Costume

The Buovina People wearing Traditional Costume, Romania

“FRODO – Foundation for the Relief of Disabled Orphans”:

http://www.frodokids.org/

Elegant Horses, Cavnic, Hija

Horses, Cavnic, Hija

“Romania Guide”:

http://travel.nationalgeographic.com/travel/countries/romania-guide/

Fagaras Mountains

Fagaras Mountains

“Romania Facts”:

http://travel.nationalgeographic.com/travel/countries/romania-facts/

Transfagarasan Road

Transfagarasan Road as featured on Top Gear. Probably one of the most amazing roads you’ll ever drive on. It´s also Romania´s highest mountain road, which was featured in BBC’s Topgear Romania Special.

“Romania Map”:

http://travel.nationalgeographic.com/travel/countries/romania-map/

Transfagarasan

Transfagarasan

“Romania: National Geographic World Music”:

http://worldmusic.nationalgeographic.com/view/page.basic/country/content.country/romania_877/en_US

Mathias Rex

Statue: Mathias Rex , Cluj-Napoca , Romania
The statue was designed by Fadrusz Janos, whose work of art won the Great prize of the Paris World Exhibition, in 1900. Unveiled in 1902, it was inaugurated as the statue of “Mathias, king of Hungary”. After the liberation of the country in 1944, its name was changed to “King Matei Corvin”, renamed by historian Daicoviciu, as “Mathias Rex”.

“Romania – Official Travel and Tourism Information”:

http://www.romaniatourism.com/info.html

George Enescu

George Enescu (Romanian pronunciation: [ˈd​͡ʒe̯ord​͡ʒe eˈnesku]; known in France as Georges Enesco; 19 August 1881, Liveni – 4 May 1955, Paris) was a Romanian composer, violinist, pianist, conductor and teacher.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/George_Enescu

George Enescu Museum, Bucharest

George Enescu Museum, Bucharest

Traditional Dishes, Romania

Traditional Dishes, Romania

ADD/ADHD

 

“Adult Psychiatric Outcomes of Girls With Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder: 11-Year Follow-Up in a Longitudinal Case-Control Study”:

http://ajp.psychiatryonline.org/cgi/content/short/167/4/409?rss=1

 

“Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder is Associated with Attachment Insecurity”:

http://www.citeulike.org/user/dasvivash/article/6925532

 

“Synergy between behavioral and pharmacologic interventions for ADHD”:

http://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/184625.php

 

“Health Tip: Managing ADHD”:

http://www.healthday.com/Article.asp?AID=637397

 

“Meta-cognitive therapy more effective for adult ADHD patients: study”:

http://www.physorg.com/news189179627.html

 

ADRES “Adverse Drug Reaction Electronic System(Adverse Drug Reactions Website)”- This website provides patients, doctors, and other medical professionals with a comprehensive examination of adverse drug reactions (ADRs), side effects, and other safety information for both prescription and over-the-counter medications.. Our goal is to allow users of our website make informed decisions when taking (patients) or prescribing (doctors) drugs. We are providing unmatched information and analysis tools.

http://www.adverse-drug-reaction.net/

 

“adders.org”:
Our objective is to promote awareness to AD/HD (Attention Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder) and to provide information and as much free practical help as we can to those affected by the condition, both adults and children, their families in the UK and around the World via this website.

http://www.adders.org/

 

“ADDISS” The National Attention Deficit Disorder Information and Support Service…

http://www.addiss.co.uk/index.html

 

“ADDA”:

http://www.add.org/index.html

 

“hi2u ADHD Pages”:

http://www..adhd..org.uk/

 

“CHADD”:

http://www.chadd.org/am/CustomPages/home/CHADD_Home.htm?CFID=2282059&CFTOKEN=38105335&jsessionid=f2303343221169802693562

SPORT

 

“Swimming Challenges ~ Includes Great Swim Series 2010(June – September 2010)”:

The Great Swim series is taking place at various locations during summer 2010. There will be four televised one-mile outdoor swims, staged in lakes, lochs and docks around the UK.

http://www.nas.org.uk/nas/jsp/polopoly.jsp?d=2551

 

“10-kilometre runs”:

http://www.nas.org.uk/nas/jsp/polopoly.jsp?d=1816

 

“Trek the Sahara – 5-25 March 2010 or 29 Oct-8 Nov 2010”:

http://www.nas.org.uk/nas/jsp/polopoly.jsp?d=2542

 

“Trek the Inca Trail – 22-31 May 2010”:

http://www.nas.org.uk/nas/jsp/polopoly.jsp?d=1863

 

“Trek Snowdon – 11–3 June 2010”:

http://www.nas.org.uk/nas/jsp/polopoly.jsp?d=2524

 

“Trek the Jurassic Coast – 16-18 July 2010”:

http://www.nas.org.uk/nas/jsp/polopoly.jsp?d=2525

 

“Trek Mount Kilimanjaro – 29 Sept-10 Oct 2010”:

http://www.nas.org.uk/nas/jsp/polopoly.jsp?d=2200

 

“Trek the Great Wall of China – 9-18 Oct 2010”:

http://www.nas.org.uk/nas/jsp/polopoly.jsp?d=2356

 

“Trek to Everest Base Camp – 5-21 November 2010”:

http://www.nas.org.uk/nas/jsp/polopoly.jsp?d=2354

 

“Cycle Cuba – 14-22 March 2010”:

http://www.nas.org.uk/nas/jsp/polopoly.jsp?d=2357

 

“London to Paris 2010 – 5-8 June”:

http://www.nas.org.uk/nas/jsp/polopoly.jsp?d=2407

 

“L’Etape du Tour 2010 – 18 July 2010”

http://www.nas.org.uk/nas/jsp/polopoly.jsp?d=2404

 

“Sky Diving – All Year Round”:

http://www.nas.org.uk/nas/jsp/polopoly.jsp?d=1726

MUSIC

 

“Derek Paravacini’s Blog”:

http://derekparavicinisblog.blogspot.com/

 

“Derek Paravacini’s Official Website”:

http://www.sonustech.com/paravicini/index.html

“The AutisMusic Project”:

http://www.autismusic.com/

ART

 

GLIMPSE – the talents of the autism community

They are painters, sculptors and photographers; poets and storytellers; musicians and creators of amazing video games. They are kids, teens and adults. Last year, a new online publication arose to celebrate the talents of autistic individuals and other developmental disabilities: GLIMPSE, offered by ICDL (The Interdisciplinary Council of Developmental and Learning Disorders). In late 2008, Volume 2 of GLIMPSE was released, and was expanded into a print book and notecards. The works are serious, humourous, deeply personal and illuminating. See it for yourself, share it with others, submit your own/your child’s work for inclusion in Volume 3, to release later this year. Find information and ordering details at www.icdl.com

 

“ARTROOM ………where under 17s can make and display art online”:

http://www.saatchi-gallery.co.uk/artroom/index.php

MOVIES/ENTERTAINMENT

 

“Shah Rukh Khan MNIK in English, shorter for Germany, Poland, France”:

http://www.magnamags.com/index.php/201004065987/stardust/scoop-of-the-day/shah-rukh-khan-mnik-in-english-shorter-for-germany-poland-france.html

 

“The London Eye Mystery at the Unicorn, London SE1”:

http://entertainment.timesonline.co.uk/tol/arts_and_entertainment/stage/theatre/article7085877.ece

 

“Film paints a colorful portrait of autistic artist”:

http://www.journalgazette.net/article/20100406/ENT03/304069985/1162

 

“Actors for Autism”:
http://www.actorsforautism.com/

BOOKS

 

“Author Mark Haddon: ‘What I love about theatre is that it’s like being a kid again”:

http://www.guardian.co.uk/books/2010/mar/28/mark-haddon-interview-polar-bears

 

“Author Michael Lewis discusses Wall Street woes … The loner with a glass eye, a medical degree and Asperger’s who makes millions betting against the subprime mortgage-bond market is just one of the unlikely heroes in Michael Lewis’ The Big Short: Inside the Doomsday Machine (Norton, $27.95). “:

http://www.dallasnews.com/sharedcontent/dws/ent/stories/DN-bk_lewisQ%26A_0328gd.ART.State.Bulldog.4c581a0.html

 

“The Big Short: Inside the Doomsday Machine by Michael Lewis review”:

http://aspie-editorial.blog-city.com/review_the_big_short_inside_the_doomsday_machine_by_michae.htm

 

“My New School: A Workbook To Help Students Transition To A New School”

by Melissa L. Trautman, MS. Ed.

http://www.asperger.net/bookstore_9054.htm

 

“Middle School: The Stuff Nobody Tells You About – A Teenage Girl With High-Functioning

Autism Shares Her Experiences”

by Haley Moss

http://www.asperger.net/bookstore_9053.htm


Award Winning “Learners on the Autism Spectrum: Preparing Highly Qualified Educators”

Editors: Kari Dunn and Pamela Wolfberg Ph.D.

http://www.asperger.net/bookstore_9504.htm


Now Available on iTunes, iPhone & iTouch!

Apple® iPhone and iTouch Applications

http://www.asperger.net/bookstore_iphone_HC.htm


“Transition or Transformation?”

Helping young people with Autism Spectrum Disorder set out on a hopeful road towards their adult lives

John Clements, Julia Hardy and Stephanie Lord

http://www.jkp.com/catalogue/book/9781843109648


“Developing College Skills in Students with Autism and Asperger’s Syndrome”

Sarita Freedman

Foreword by Tony Attwood

http://www.jkp.com/catalogue/book/9781843109174

MOVIE

“Furry Vengeance”

Trailer: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-CimpBqZoiQ


Synopsis: “FURRY VENGEANCE” is a live action family comedy in which an ambitious young real estate developer, Dan Sanders, faces off with a band of angry animals when his new housing subdivision pushes too far into a pristine part of the wilderness. Led by an incredibly clever raccoon, the animals stymie the development and teach our hero about the environmental consequences of man’s encroachment on nature.

http://uk.rottentomatoes.com/m/1212891-furry_vengeance/


Toy Story 3 Coming June 18, 2010

http://uk.rottentomatoes.com/m/toy_story_3/


“Toy Story 3: New Toys Gallery”:

http://techland.com/2010/03/16/toy-story-3-new-toys-gallery/

VIDEO GAME

“Super Mario Galaxy 2(Wii)

Release Date: June 11, 2010

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Super_Mario_Galaxy_2.

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Super-Mario-Galaxy-2-Wii/dp/B002BSA388/ref=pd_nr_vg_h__15?ie=UTF8&s=videogames

 

“Puzzle game ‘Tetris’ eases long-term stress”:

http://uk.videogames.games.yahoo.com/blog/article/10035/

TECH

“Look, no hands: Cars that drive better than you:”

http://www.newscientist.com/article/mg20627542.100-look-no-hands-cars-that-drive-better-than-you.html

 

“Is This The End of Your Radio?”:

http://new.uk.music.yahoo.com/blogs/touchingthevoid/28943/is-this-the-end-of-your-radio/

LIFE

Neurons

“Picking Our Brains: Can We Regenerate The Brain?:

http://www.newscientist.com/article/mg20627541.300-picking-our-brains-can-we-regenerate-the-brain.html

 

Take Care,

Julie

Romanian Mountains

 



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